trouble ahead

I had to write that letter to your mother,
and I had to tell the judge that it was you,
and I had to sell the car & go to Florida
because that's just my way of saying that I love you.
-Laurie Anderson

a specific blue rises through the heat until i'm clutching my head & your smug heart cries out like a lover. wasn't there a room in your old house where we slept on the floor for a week? when i went out to grab a pizza you wrote lazy little fuckers on the wall. at the supermarket today i pretended not to notice, but tell me what i'm thinking & the joint is yours. or that time in the park with my hand in your shirt -- you were telling lies about your family as you sucked my nipples & was your uncle really an admiral? mine wasn't, but we weren't all that close -- don't let it come between us. sometimes i think the best night of my life was when we beat the shit out of that book & i fell into your arms. you called me baby, whispered, “hear my call from the floor, at the heart of the party,” then i passed out.

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ted@magicdog.com -- 1 June 1999