the sky is cryin’ — another day of torrential rain & unseasonal cold in sydney… by way of comparison, the little rome weather report that appears in the sidebar of my yahoo claims rome is having a dusty day… dusty? i didn’t even know that was a type of weather… although when i checked the full rome weather report, it said foggy… which is more conventional, if a little less interesting…
leavin’ on a jet plane — 9.23pm & keri’s well on her way to bangkok, where she’ll change planes somewhere between two & four tomorrow morning (sydney time) for her connecting flight to rome… i took an rdo today & spent it helping keri sort out a handful of last minute chores, & trying to cram six weeks worth of being with her into six or so hours… which was impossible, of course, but it turned out to be a really nice, if bittersweet, day…
hold the camera still, you idiot — on uploading the images from my camera i discovered i’d managed to stuff up a final photo-op by unconsciously wiggling at exactly the wrong moment… no amount of pixel-pushing could repair the quake damage… [note to self: stay still after you press the button - the camera takes a second or so to grab the image…]
rattlin’ around — so i’ve been rattlin’ around my flat tonight, which feels strangely empty, a phenomenon all the more strange given we don’t actually cohabit… maybe it’s just an early indication that all of sydney’s gonna feel empty for the next six months…
so yeah — here i am, hoping my tone can sustain me through the next six weeks… i’m totally looking forward going to italy, but i wish i’d been flying out with keri today…
from the trying-not-to-think-about-it(aly) department — after a long period of inactivity on the squash front, i’ve started playing a couple of afternoons a week after work… i mentioned this to andrew a few days ago, & it turned out that (unbeknownst to me) andrew’s a mad keen (this was not the unbeknownst bit) squash nut (this was)… so andrew’s trying to track down a court we can hire, & it looks like my squash commitments are about to increase…
not that i’m complaining — more squash is more good… i’ve been surprised at how much i’ve enjoyed playing again… the lurching, the wheezing, the stitches, the sweating, the unseemly gasping for breath & the futile waving of the racquet in what a passing semiotician might interpret as a complicated gesture of complete, unconditional surrender… hmmm… did i mention the soreness that follows?
failure of the will — i’ve been trying really hard not to type the words duty free playstation 2, but i just couldn’t resist any longer…
miscellaneous development notice — been thinking about reorganising some parts of my life… (done a lot of work sorting out my apartment recently, & i seem to have developed either a bit of momentum or delusions of grandeur)… it’s all a bit amorphous just at present, but i might write some more about it in the next week or so… as much to help me get things sorted out (“sorted mentally out”) as anything else…
aubade again:
rain in marrickville, windows of the bus filmed with heat & metaphysics, long list of regrets dragged behind your body like the remnants of every shirt you ever owned, rag trade, street signs, systemic un-becomings you acknowledge as you fall asleep, orgasm-damp curls between your thighs, fingers keeping your place, waiting for you to start again, inescapable tradition you spend days reinventing, a kind of shuffle, mild anxieties & the sheer exhaustion of it, a mood that isn’t sadness but shares its timbre emerges from your skin, frame built from the metaphors you wanted to avoid but couldn’t, not answers, other questions, technologies of living with a lighter touch, hand brushing hairs on your lover’s distant arm or your face considered dispassionately, a physiognomy you entertain then carefully discard, wrapped in motion, suspended, each breath a little easier, faint taste of grief to embrace, streetlights, marrickville, bus moving through the rain.
& far away in technical boy band
